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“Swing way, sway the Arborine one. If a me, eat out mi muma peas Dry river, woulda come dong car mi whe.”
Before I begin- if you prefer to listen scroll to the bottom of the page for audio download.
ok lets go ….That’s a bit of patois from my Maroon father. It means sway, move the lying one. Let the person who really did this be revealed. Lies are a natural part of life. We all tell them. But the reasons behind them? That’s where the real story is.
I learned to lie early. My mother was abusive, my siblings tormented me, and I was the only one from Canada. I felt alone. So when no one had my back, I lied. Did you go to the store? Yes. Did you play while you went to the store? No. I lied to protect myself, to create a safer reality. But lies are walls that keep the truth from getting in. And eventually, those walls need to come down.
In the group home, I had to unlearn lies. I didn’t need them anymore. And learning to deal in truth, honestly and openly, felt like childproofing my spirit. Just like we childproof a home to keep little hands from danger, I needed to safeguard my mind and soul from the damage of old patterns.
How Do We Childproof Our Spirit?
For 16 years, I was a nanny. I met children and parents—some great, some terrible. And I saw that kids, like adults, do things out of protection. A child lies not to deceive but to avoid harm. If we create an environment where they don’t need to lie, they are free to be themselves. The same applies to us.
Childproofing our spirit means putting safeguards in place to protect our mental and emotional health. It means recognizing our triggers and setting up barriers before we fall. When I was deeply depressed, I started noticing the patterns: overeating, drinking, isolating myself. It wasn’t about discipline; it was about making small changes to prevent self-destruction.
Steps to Childproof Your Spirit
- Stock Your Life With What Feeds You – Literally and figuratively. When I was happy, I stocked my home with healthy food so that when I got sad, I couldn’t reach for junk that would keep me down. What do you consume when you’re at your lowest? Is it helping you rise, or keeping you stuck?
- Surround Yourself With the Right People – Not enablers, but protectors. The ones who put their foot down before you roll off the cliff. When you’re in an upswing, take note of who really has your back. Those are the ones who will catch you when you fall.
- Organize Your Space – Clutter is chaos. Losing something in a moment of frustration can trigger old wounds. Make your life easier by creating order when you’re in a good place, so when the darkness creeps in, it doesn’t find extra fuel.
- Accept That Some Things Aren’t About You – We absorb so much pain that isn’t ours to carry. Someone else’s anger, the world’s chaos, the market crashing—it’s not all about you. Stay still in your power and let it pass.
- Create Safe Spaces for Sadness – You don’t have to be afraid of feeling low. When a child falls, they cry, and then they get up. Depression is a wave—let it come, feel it, and know you will rise again. Childproof your spirit so you can be sad without harming yourself.
The World Won’t Stop Moving, But You Can Stand Still
There’s a land that I see where the children are free. A song from my childhood. I believe we should all have that space—inside and out—where we are free to feel, free to heal, free to be. If we build our internal safeguards, we won’t fear the inevitable lows of life. We will not break when the world shakes.
So if you’re feeling like the world is ending, believe me—it’s not. Hold on to something steady. Find your anchors. And when you fall, fall safely, knowing you’ve put the right nets in place.
full circle we not need lie to protect ourselves as child may do , we now can lie in the comfort of inner protection – feel it all and know that this too shall pass.
This too shall pass.
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